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Soft Reset's avatar

As someone who's lived through this exact transition, thank you for capturing what so many of us experience but can't quite put into words. The shift from "charming European bureaucracy" to "why does getting internet require three appointments and a blood sacrifice" is painfully accurate.

I remember thinking I was uniquely bad at being an expat because simple tasks felt impossibly difficult comparing to a home-land experience.

What really resonates is your point about the nervous system being on high alert. I never connected those dots, but it explains why everything felt so exhausting those first couple years. Back home, running errands was mindless. Here, every interaction requires mental preparation and leaves you drained.

The loneliness is real too. You can't just casually chat with the cashier or make small talk - suddenly you're analyzing every social cue wondering if you're being rude.

But you're absolutely right about finding that deeper, steadier love. Five years in, I can finally laugh about accidentally ordering liver instead of pasta, or showing up to a formal event in jeans because I misunderstood the dress code. Those nightmare moments become the stories that make you who you are.

Thank you for reminding us that struggling doesn't mean we're failing - it means we're human.

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Amanda Izzo's avatar

I loved this. Heartfelt, beautifully written and thoughtful. I really enjoyed this read! 🧡

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